Segment on Emotion, we are going to be looking at
Do you fume when someone cuts you off in traffic? Does your blood pressure rocket when your child refuses to cooperate?
Anger is an emotion characterized by antagonism toward someone or something you feel has deliberately done you wrong.
Anger can be a good thing. It can give a way to express negative feelings, or motivate you to find solutions to problems. Anger is a completely normal, usually healthy, human emotion.
But excessive anger can cause problems. When it gets out of control, it can turn destructive. Anger can bring problems at work, in one’s personal relationships, and in the overall quality of one’s life. And it can make one feel as though one is at the mercy of an unpredictable and powerful emotion.
Hence, this writeup is meant to help us to understand and control anger.
Ready to get your anger under control? Start by considering the following anger management tips.
1. Think before you speak.
In the heat of the moment, it’s easy to say something you’ll later regret. Take a few moments to collect your thoughts before saying anything — and allow others involved in the situation to do the same.
2. Regain your cool
Once you’re calm, you will be able to think clearly, then you can express your frustration in an assertive but non-confrontational way. State your concerns and needs clearly and directly, without hurting others or trying to control them.
3. Get some exercise
Physical activity can help reduce stress that can cause you to become angry. If you feel your anger escalating, go for a brisk walk or run, or spend some time doing other enjoyable physical activities.
4. Take a timeout
Timeouts aren’t just for kids. Give yourself short breaks during times of the day that tend to be stressful. A few moments of quiet time might help you feel better prepared to handle what’s ahead without getting irritated or angry.
5. Identify possible solutions
Instead of focusing on what made you mad, work on resolving the issue at hand.
Does your child’s messy room drive you crazy? Close the door.
Is your partner always coming late for dinner every night? Schedule meals later in the evening, or agree to eat on your own a few times a week. Remind yourself that anger won’t fix anything and might only make it worse.
6. Stick with ‘I’ statements
To avoid criticizing or placing blame — which might only increase tension — use “I” statements to describe the problem. Be respectful and specific. For example, say, “I’m upset that you always come home late after closing at work,” instead of, “You never come home early after work.”
7. Don’t hold a grudge
Forgiveness is a powerful tool. If you allow anger and other negative feelings to crowd out positive feelings, you might find yourself swallowed up by your own bitterness or sense of injustice. But if you can forgive someone who angered you, you might both learn from the situation. It’s unrealistic to expect everyone to be have exactly as you want at all times.
8. Use humor to release tension
Lightening up can help diffuse tension. Use humor to help you face what’s making you angry and, possibly, any unrealistic expectations you have for how things should go. Avoid sarcasm, it can hurt feelings and make things worse.
9. Practice relaxation skills
When your temper flares, put relaxation skills to work. Practice deep-breathing exercises, imagine a relaxing scene, or repeat a calming word or phrase, such as, “be Cool man” — whatever it takes to encourage relaxation.
10. Remember, one of the greatest men (the Prophet of Islam, PBUH) that ever walked the earth said, “a angry man should not work because he will destroy in one day, what he had worked for in 20 years.” His prescription for anger is if you are standing when angered, sit down, if it persists, lie down, if it persists, leave the scene.
If what you are about to say will fuel up the matter, he recommends, zipping up.
Employ these then ways then Enjoy this one life!
Keji Fatima writes